Tail turned to red sunset on a juniper crown a lone magpie cawks.
Mad at Oryoki in the shrine-room — Thistles blossomed late afternoon.
Put on my shirt and took it off in the sun walking the path to lunch.
A dandelion seed floats above the marsh grass with the mosquitos.
At 4 A.M. the two middleaged men sleeping together holding hands.
In the half-light of dawn a few birds warble under the Pleiades.
Sky reddens behind fir trees, larks twitter, sparrows cheep cheep cheep
cheep cheep.
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Comments
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I was introduced to this poem in a class of mine, and fell in love with it. It is just my style of writing when I am down. It helps your pen flow, and put some feelings down. Also, if you really study this peom, he was very careful. It was written in the winter, in the south. You know this because of the constellation mentioned, and the plants mentioned. One last thing - if you really check the poem out, each line was carefully crafted to have just about the same number of syllables.
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a piece..just a piece? it is a magical electrifying thought process...136 syllables ....more or less....would not ring as many bells...
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Why 136 syllables?
An intreaging poem, but mainly because I can really see where it is going, or from where it came. I reads like a short journal entry with a few poetic devices thrown in to make it more pleasing.
Maybe it is a just is piece.
Andrew
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