My sleeping children are still flying dreams
in their goose-down heads.
The lush of the river singing morning songs
Fish watch their ceilings turn sun-white.
The grey-green pike lances upstream
Kale, like mermaid's hair
points the water's drift.
All is morning hush
and bird beautiful.
I only,
I didn't have flu.
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Comments
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IMMENSE!
From guest Sarah (contact)
i love the part where it says 'fish watch their ceilings turn sun white.' i love it because it means the waters surface when it says the ceiling!mm ba ba ba ba!im lovin it! -
If I could applaud this, I would. It is so beautiful. The last two lines almost make sense 'I only,' needs something on the end. I love the description though.
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8/10
I do not see any errors here. I like the abstraction in this piece but only by vernacular. I haven't really read this 'type' in his other pieces, but, I do like the tone of it.
A great piece he has written here.
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