I thought of killing myself because I am only a bricklayer
and you a woman who loves the man who runs a drug store.
I don't care like I used to; I lay bricks straighter than I
used to and I sing slower handling the trowel afternoons.
When the sun is in my eyes and the ladders are shaky and the
mortar boards go wrong, I think of you.
Leave a guest comment (subject to review)
Comments
-
I find the first couplet as not only metaphorical but allegorical as well.
It seems to me, as if, the woman in which the character loves can't seem to feel he is good enough for her because he is just a peasant and she is flirting or is in love with one who isn't. A higher class of person.
And he loves her, but, she won't give him the time of day because he doesn't have any money (so to say).
That's what I get from the first part.
The second part is a vibration of the first part I feel. Yet, there he seems not to care, yet, in all reality I feel he still does. He is just saying it doesn't bother him when deep down it actually does.
I didn't care for the enjambment there, it doesn't rest well with me. It didn't seem to move smooth in the reading of it.
But, my conclusion the second comes to a halt and rest when I feel I am correct in my assumption. He says he doesn't care in the second, but, as he works in the hot blistering sun (euphamism) he still thinks of her, yet, he doesn't care - but he does.
There is much reality to this piece as the observants above have noted and I feel it works in the favor of the piece. I do like this piece, it's quite good. I just didn't like the enjambment in the second part.
-
Yea, philophant said it. I like the reality of this piece, that anyone can relate to it, but I don't really like the poem.
shrugs
-
Sad and sweet. I like these short poems. They have something to them....it's down to earth and believeable.
Adding your comment:
