The man
I used to meet in the mirror
is no more.
Now I see a wasted face.
It dribbles tears.
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Dribbles is a key word here, I feel, it creates such a stronger impact. Dribbles reveals weakness I think - it shows so much more. Eh, hard to explain, brilliant though, once again
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Across cultures and centuries we meet - Maya Angelou said that our common humanity is greater than our differences - how right she was. As time passes and we look in the mirror we see a constantly changing face and are constantly amazed by this person who is ourselves and yet not.
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This recollection of the happy and purposeful days adds beauty to Tanka! The mirror is used so nicely to represent the review of the inability due to sickness to go on travel and see the nature in its true perspective and enjoy. the glare in the face acquired by touring to see the naure is absent as he was bed ridden.This tells us that shiki is a nature poet and Tanka describes the fruits of nature so well.
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This is a wonderful write. I think it makes perfect sense. I like it a lot. Just remember we only see what we want to see. Let me clarify that a little bit. A young girl over the age of 15 stands in front of the mirror to only see herself fat and not beautiful. She often questions herself on how she looks. But she fails to understand that appearance is not everything. She fails to understand that beauty is deep within the skin. It is far most reside in the heart. I don't know if you probably capture what I am saying here. Sometimes it is best to not judge ourselves. I think it is best to let other judge us; although, they will misjudge us most of the time, we just have to know our values. We have to understand how much we worth. Don't be fool by a picture. Try to see what that picture really means. It is a pleasure reading this piece. I am not going to lie to you, I truly like it. Anyway, Keep up the good work and may your day be blessed. By the way, before I live, I just want you to know that the man you see facing the mirror is the creation of God himself. Remember that God created us in his own self image....
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Very glad to meet this poem. I'm always concerned about translations, but this comes across beautifully. After reading Shiki's bio, I can see how his sketch-from-life philosophy informs the poem and sparked a reawakening of the form.
Concise, powerful, and eternally contemporary. Thanks Ma'atkara -
gah, this is short and sweet, and leaves sooo much to the imagination for interpretation...great job
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Thanks to whoever promoted this, it is a very good one. Good example of flexible 'syllable number' too. I couldn't avoid using the promotion points, I'm afraid...it didn't appear on the author's list (of the featured poems/authors).
~ Ma'atkara
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this is an excellent piece so much said in so few words ..a true gift for the heart...I am unfamiliar with exactly how to do a tanka...but this imspires me..freda
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this is so moving a piece ...
i have applied to join the tanka class because i really am starting to like the brevity and skill of sucj short form poems that - like this one- say more than a million words ever could
elainexx -
I remember him too, though the face I see now still smiles and remembers the good time which brought him here. The journey may have left its marks, but what views were seen.
Andrew
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