Old Poetry Poetry Poets Essays Forums

"Augustus Gloop..."

"Augustus Gloop! Augustus Gloop!
The great big greedy nincompoop!
How long could we allow this beast
To gorge and guzzle, feed and feast
On everything he wanted to?
Great Scott! It simply wouldn't do!
However long this pig might live,
We're positive he'd never give
Even the smallest bit of fun
Or happiness to anyone.
So what we do in cases such
As this, we use the gentle touch,
And carefully we take the brat
And turn him into something that
Will give great pleasure to us all–
A doll, for instance, or a ball,
Or marbles or a rocking horse.
But this revolting boy, of course,
Was so unutterably vile,
So greedy, foul, and infantile
He left a most disgusting taste
Inside our mouths, and so in haste
We chose a thing that, come what may,
Would take the nasty taste away.
'Come on!' we cried, 'The time is ripe
To send him shooting up the pipe!
He has to go! It has to be!'
And very soon, he's going to see
Inside the room to which he's gone
Some funny things are going on.
But don't, dear children, be alarmed;
Augustus Gloop will not be harmed,
Although, of course, we must admit
He will be altered quite a bit.
He'll be quite changed from what he's been,
When he goes through the fudge machine:
Slowly, the wheels go round and round,
The cogs begin to grind and pound;
A hundred knives go slice, slice, slice;
We add some sugar, cream, and spice;
We boil him for a minute more,
Until we're absolutely sure
That all the greed and all the gall
Is boiled away for once and all.
Then out he comes! And now! By grace!
A miracle has taken place!
This boy, who only just before
Was loathed by men from shore to shore,
This greedy brute, this louse's ear,
Is loved by people everywhere!
For who could hate or bear a grudge
Against a luscious bit of fudge?"

Notes


(from Charlie and the Chocolate Factory)

Leave a guest comment (subject to review)

    : Comment:

    Name: (required)
    Email: (required, hidden from spam)

Comments


  • December 9, 2009
    Edit | Reply

    love

    From guest katie (contact)
    i love this poem soo much x i have choosen it to do an essay at school on it, i think it is an amazing poem x


  • March 23, 2009
    Edit | Reply
    From guest devesh (contact)
    lol its amazing it has the rhythm and everything a poem needs


  • March 23, 2009
    Edit | Reply
    From guest devesh (contact)
    a really nice funny good poem


  • Ang
    January 25, 2008
    Edit | Reply

    Lol. this is good


  • September 1, 2007
    Edit | Reply

    hehehe

    From guest Augustus (contact)
    *victory dance* -first commentor! woo, lol but seriously awesome poem with nice rhythm... what poems are all about!