The animal I really dig,
Above all others is the pig.
Pigs are noble. Pigs are clever,
Pigs are courteous. However,
Now and then, to break this rule,
One meets a pig who is a fool.
What, for example, would you say,
If strolling through the woods one day,
Right there in front of you you saw
A pig who'd built his house of STRAW?
The Wolf who saw it licked his lips,
And said, "That pig has had his chips."
"Little pig, little pig, let me come in!"
"No, no, by the hairs on my chinny-chin-chin!"
"Then I'll huff and I'll puff and I'll blow your house in!"
The little pig began to pray,
But Wolfie blew his house away.
He shouted, "Bacon, pork and ham!
Oh, what a lucky Wolf I am!"
And though he ate the pig quite fast,
He carefully kept the tail till last.
Wolf wandered on, a trifle bloated.
Surprise, surprise, for soon he noted
Another little house for pigs,
And this one had been built of TWIGS!
"Little pig, little pig, let me come in!"
"No, no, by the hairs on my chinny-chin-chin!"
"Then I'll huff and I'll puff and I'll blow your house in!"
The Wolf said, "Okay, here we go!"
He then began to blow and blow.
The little pig began to squeal.
He cried, "Oh Wolf, you've had one meal!
Why can't we talk and make a deal?
The Wolf replied, "Not on your nelly!"
And soon the pig was in his belly.
"Two juicy little pigs!" Wolf cried,
"But still I'm not quite satisfied!
I know how full my tummy's bulging,
But oh, how I adore indulging."
So creeping quietly as a mouse,
The Wolf approached another house,
A house which also had inside
A little piggy trying to hide.
"You'll not get me!" the Piggy cried.
"I'll blow you down!" the Wolf replied.
"You'll need," Pig said, "a lot of puff,
And I don't think you've got enough."
Wolf huffed and puffed and blew and blew.
The house stayed up as good as new.
"If I can't blow it down," Wolf said,
I'll have to blow it up instead.
I'll come back in the dead of night
And blow it up with dynamite!"
Pig cried, "You brute! I might have known!"
Then, picking up the telephone,
He dialed as quickly as he could
The number of red Riding Hood.
"Hello," she said. "Who's speaking? Who?
Oh, hello, Piggy, how d'you do?"
Pig cried, "I need your help, Miss Hood!
Oh help me, please! D'you think you could?"
"I'll try of course," Miss Hood replied.
"What's on your mind...?" "A Wolf!" Pig cried.
"I know you've dealt with wolves before,
And now I've got one at my door!"
"My darling Pig," she said, "my sweet,
That's something really up my street.
I've just begun to wash my hair.
But when it's dry, I'll be right there."
A short while later, through the wood,
Came striding brave Miss Riding Hood.
The Wolf stood there, his eyes ablaze,
And yellowish, like mayonnaise.
His teeth were sharp, his gums were raw,
And spit was dripping from his jaw.
Once more the maiden's eyelid flickers.
She draws the pistol from her knickers.
Once more she hits the vital spot,
And kills him with a single shot.
Pig, peeping through the window, stood
And yelled, "Well done, Miss Riding Hood!"
Ah, Piglet, you must never trust
Young ladies from the upper crust.
For now, Miss Riding Hood, one notes,
Not only has two wolfskin coats,
But when she goes from place to place,
She has a PIGSKIN TRAVELING CASE.
Leave a guest comment (subject to review)
Comments
1 - 7 of 7
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From guest Florrie (contact)
This has been wicked to study as part of my open university course, it's grabbed my interest into poetry -
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ideas
From guest victoria (contact)
dear Mr. dahl where do you get your ideas.and what do you have subjection.Cause i love to write and read poems all the time.i love your books email me back.so i can start my ideas and dedicate it to you. -
olivia
From guest olivia (contact)
I have always loved Roald Dahl, he is my role model ever since ive read his books and poems i have loved writing and reading. Reading this poem and others it is a honer to say I LOVE THIS POEM thank you Roald Dahl.. -
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This is the best poetry
From guest Amy (contact)
im the miss ridin hood and im playing 3 litle pigs and miss rigind hood. imm from romania! -
From guest emma (contact)
i think that poem is the best yet i really like it espacially the pistol from her knickers lol -
COOL
From guest Lauren (contact)
I like the story. And the end is very funny. In the other books it doesn't have Little Red Riding Hood. -
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What a Poem!
From guest Pam Boivie (contact)
What a poem to make us laugh! There could be no better end than a funny one! Thanks Mr. Dahl...maybe you can hear us, from the grave! -
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i love revolting rymes
From guest Leah Hand (contact)
wow i love roald dahl he's a fantabydosey poet! -
i love these revolting rhymes!!
From guest Happiness (contact)
hi i love roald dahl's revolting rhymes theyre so funny. If he was still alive, i would thank him 4 bringing happiness 2 people. And to all u people asking him 2 reply, he can't. Because,sadly, he's dead.R.I.P. ROALD DAHL x
MOD MESSAGE
But at least other people can now how you feel and can also appreciate his poetry through your eyes. -
From guest Rosie Menton (contact)
roll doll you are boss i love the poem its the best poem in the world you are amazing an i am 7 i am 8 in april p.s you are the best poem writer in the world xx -
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From guest bethany (contact)
i am doing a play on this poem i am little red and my school friends are pigs and one is a wolf i love this play that we are doing it is very fun. -
From guest charlie (contact)
I am doing the play at school iam very interested in roald dahl this is for him thankyou please reply roald dahl -
good
From guest kerryann maule (contact)
i think it was relly good and a group perfromed it at my school -
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fun
From guest viky (contact)
dear r.d i love this poem i have it in oral reading thanks for writting them keep on writting!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!1 -
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COOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOL
From guest ELLS--SMELLS (contact)
THREE LITTLE PIGS THIS POEM IS SO COOL,FUNNY,EXCITING AND TOTALLY WIERD!
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The Late Mr Dahl
From guest J (contact)
I just love this story, and all his others, especially those from the colleection of Revolting Rhymes. -
The 3 little pigs
From guest Samantha (contact)
Roald Dahl is one of my favourite authors and i love Roald Dahl's revolting Rhymes it is brilliant and i also enjoy reading to my freinds , and friends also enjoy them , so i would just like to say well done Roald and you are my favourite author and always will be x goodbye x x x -
This is a very funny poem!
From guest 3 Endurance (contact)
It is a very enjoyable poem! It is very different from the usual story. This is the best poem ever! Thank you! From 3 Endurance, Woodlands Primary School, Singapore -
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TWISTED!
From guest Miss K (contact)
Roald Dahl has put a fantasic twist on a classic fairytale. Who would of thought that Little Miss Riding Hood would show up, then kill the pig in the end? It changes the whole plot and the denoument of the story. -
HEHE
From guest nathan (contact)
It's really good how he took something as bland and boring as a fairy tale and then transforms it into something spectacular, this is also my favourite poem by him. nathan,12 -
that was awesome!!
From guest Mallory (contact)
i really like this version of th three little pigs! i picked this poem to do as my forensics speach and my teacher really likes it!!:-D -
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Love it
From guest H. Elizabeth (contact)
I remember my mum reading me this and all my friends would be confused when i told them this version because they were told the classic ...but this is far better!!! -
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oh wow
From guest Kim (contact)
hihi (to last comment) Miss Riding Hood isnt that sweet after all! but you know, if you do wznt to read one of these types of poem to your son, read him R.D's version og Goldilocks. It teaches against thieving! -
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hé hé
From guest jéjé (contact)
j aime internet on trouve tout les truc qu on fait en anglais c cool mdr -
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hello
From guest Anya (contact)
hello, that was fab i really enjoyed my xmas play ia goldilocks it is sooo great soo far i have got all your books!!! -
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wow
From guest zakhia (contact)
i liked the story but it was just to long and i liked the words that sound the same but once again it was just to long. -
oh my god.....
From guest cara Rundle (contact)
why does it have to be so long? we are doing this thing at school and we have to recite a poem and i like all of roald's poems but they are so long!!!! -
I Know
From guest me (contact)
I know this fable i have read before i thing the ending i really funny(better with the illerstractions) well written -
How do I listen to
From guest Mini Mell2` (contact)
How do i listen to the poem my teacher said you could -
Wonderful!
Looking forward to reading more weird and wonderful
words from Roald Dahl..... -
not for toddler tho'
From guest Sani (contact)
it's quite different from the stories we read or being read to when we were a child but i do find it amusing and how it reflect the real world! not sure if i am going to read it to my boy tho' - i think he will be very sad to know that all the little pigs were killed in the end and miss riding hood was not as sweet as she seemed to be! -
From guest souvagie (contact)
this is such a lovely story!!! love to all my frends! from hemelsdaele -
The story was awesome!
From guest Mohammad Yasir (contact)
The story was so funny that i couldn't even stop myself laughing -
cute
very entertaining and very well written.
Thank you for letting me read this poem and I want to see more of your work.
MOD MESSAGE
Sadly Roald Dahl is no longer with us but he has left behind an awful lot of prose and poetry, some of which can be found on this site. -
From guest katil (contact)
just incase people are misunderstanding this is a farce by Roald Dahl, let me inform you that the poem actually relates to the political situation prevalent in Dahl's time (which isn't much different from the present day i believe). This is a wonderful piece by him and one of the best i've read -
dudy story lol
From guest jordan (contact)
CCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCC OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO LLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLL STORY -
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This is so adorable! I love this so much
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Great
From guest Kaylee (contact)
I think this a relly good poem it is funny but also different then the real one you know what is talking about and it is not to hard to read a bout it. You can realate relly well to this story for what it is a bout and how it told by -
three lilttle pigs
From guest claudia (contact)
i think that this subverted story is very funny. could you please send me an email to tell me any new ones that will come out. -
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to claudia
We do not send out emails I'm sorry. You can always return to read others by this poet. You can also subscribe to receive a Poem of the Day' by email.
Glad you enjoyed this poem by Dahl, check out his other work too.
Regards,
Von - Oldpoetry
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Give Miss Hood some credit...she made the most of an opportunity. I do rather like Dahl's Three Little Pigs farce better than the original.
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funny
From guest Rita (contact)
i have the drama about 3 litter pigs.I like the words in the poetry and it make me interested when I read this.my young brother so lov it and told everyone in his class. -
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I luv it
From guest Lissy liate (contact)
This is a great poem! many of my friends have got it and rehearse it at drama eistedfords! we love doing them and Roald Dahl, my ledgend! just happens to have the right peices for us! I LOVE YOU ROALD! -
From guest caitlin (contact)
we are doin the three little pigs for our leavers play n ma teacher picked this on i hink its brill -
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hilarious!!!
From guest rayann (contact)
i loved reading roald dalh's stories since the day i was born!!!...........his writing style,technique and stories are hilarious !!!!and you can never get bored of them!!!! i believe this is an excellent way (this site) to recieve and able to read his stories if you dont have his books!! -
That Is Good
From guest LilPrincess (contact)
That Is Very Funny Is Amasing Hoe Roald Dahl Could Do That I Sure Couldent! Its Brill!! -
AMAZING!!!
I really enjoyed it!I could read is poems all day!!!wow!!!!I love it!!! -
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Three Little Pigs and Red Riding Hood
From guest Joe Marching (contact)
Mingling fairy tale characters, using up to date English, putting in the story an unusual ending and unusual elements like the phone: simply great! But isn't poetry the use of words in an unusual way? It's ham for Roald's teeth. -
From guest Janice Luo (contact)
I use to think that Roald Dahl can only write books,but after reading this poem, I found out that he can write such a fantastic poem1What a talented person he is. -
From guest raechel. (contact)
no matter how old..i am..i cannot get over the humour of this poen..reminds me of my good old days where i used to attend elcution classes..!!awesome poem...! -
From guest JockClark (contact)
I studied this as part of an Arts and Humanities degree and loved it! -
Great Piece of Work!
The humor is set in really nicely with the ironic twist at closure, I really like the blending of the nursery rhymes. Wonderful to read! -
AWESOME POEM!!!!
From guest Jenna (contact)
This is an awesome, fantastic, wonderful, fabullous...and so on, POEM!! It ROCKS!!!!! -
OMG This is sooo funny!!! I love it! ^_^ haha pigskin traveling case haha.
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i love this
From guest joshua healy (contact)
man i love pigs....especially when there in m y belly! -
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3 Little Pigs
From guest Melissa Teague (contact)
Oh my goodness. This is terribly funny. I originally looked up The Revolting Poems because I ran across a list of banned books while teaching Catcher in the Rye with my 11th Graders. I would really like to incorporate some of these poems. I know my students would get a kick out of the fun, and I would be able to motivate them to READ as well. -
3 LIL PIGS
From guest Chats (contact)
I love this story, I love the fact that its not like other fairy tales, and has an unusual ending, and I LOVE THE RHYMING, FABULOUS ROALD DAHL. I LOVE YOU
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