They fuck you up, your mum and dad.
They may not mean to, but they do.
They fill you with the faults they had
And add some extra, just for you.
But they were fucked up in their turn
By fools in old-style hats and coats,
Who half the time were soppy-stern
And half at one another's throats.
Man hands on misery to man.
It deepens like a coastal shelf.
Get out as early as you can,
And don't have any kids yourself.
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Comments
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The poem above
From guest Maddie (contact)
I'm doing a paper on this poem. And from what I've read in the comments, its basically about a part of his life, somewhat a dark yet slightly humourous side of his life which is conveyed in a way that isn't exaggerated falsely but in a true and honest way (that can be found funny). Am I kind of on the right path here? -
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i agree
From guest K (contact)
I don't want to leave any kids behind in a society that poisons everything - even kills their closest relatives. We have become so perverted that we deserve to die... -
From guest Patrice Dardompre (contact)
a cynicially brilliant poem indeed. definitely added a diffrent twist 2 the table. -
This be the verse
From guest Rob Norton (contact)
Simply the best poem I've ever read - and the truest! -
Nod from another Larkin
From guest Merrily Larkin (contact)
I just learned of this poem today referenced in a Vanity Fair article on Christopher Buckley's new memoir, "Losing Mum and Pup." The poem mirrors my life...much turmoil, got out early, and most importantly, had no kids. My parents died at 60. I'm 61, and thanks to therapy work, quite happily retired. -
parents
From guest amanda (contact)
i love this poem it means a lot to me becuse i really connect with it -
This be the verse
From guest Kevin Straw (contact)
What about: They give you good your Mum and Dad. They mean to and by God they do. They fill you with the good they had And love you extra just for you. For they were done good in their turn By folks wise tho’ in different coat Who knew just when they should be stern And when they could sit back and dote. Man hands on happiness to man. It ripens self into un-self. Go on as loving as you can, And make your kids just like yourself. -
Larkin's poem
From guest Rosie (contact)
i saw abit of this poem while i was reading a piece of torn paper i found on my floor. very funny, very true. the way i see it, Larkin was trying to say that life has sad truths but even these can be viewed in a funny, silly light. -
This be the verse
From guest MJ Maher (contact)
I am writing a book and would like to quote this peom. I would like to know who to write to to get consent to do this, my reference is James O, 2003 but J don't think he holds the copy right of the peom. It is an academic psychoanalytic book. -
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To Guest M J Maher
As you will see from the note at the side of this poem Larkins demise is comparitevely recent and that means copyright still exists with his heirs and assigns. I suggest you look at a specific Larkin site for further details, especially if your book is to published for profit.
Jim
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From guest JC (contact)
thank you philip- I gave this poem to my kids yesterday and i think it helped! -
comment on the comments
From guest Rach (contact)
Many questions over the meanings and many spelling mistakes in the process. I think Larkin would not like to be taken this seriously. I agree with Jesse, this is a man writing in dark humour, and about himself! The line 'they may not mean to, but they do.' shows the unintentional bad qualities passed through generations, and this does happen! He makes light of the many changes through the generations and comments briefly but precisely on this. -
Robert Louis Stephenson's Grave
From guest Kitty K (contact)
The title is an allusion to Robert Louis Stephenson's, "Requiem" especially line 5, "This be the verse you grave for me" UNDER the wide and starry sky Dig the grave and let me lie: Glad did I live and gladly die, And I laid me down with a will. This be the verse you 'grave for me: 5 Here he lies where he long'd to be; Home is the sailor, home from the sea, And the hunter home from the hill. -
poem
From guest laura lou (contact)
eye catching but very narrow minded. cheer up love myt neva happen. -
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This be the verse
From guest Jessi with an eye (contact)
Oh come on, you guys! He's being tongue-in-cheek and sardonic. This poem is dark humor. I wish there were an English word for "believing strongly in what you say even as you are making fun of it." The title uses elevated language, claiming that this is the verse (and meaning/theme) to end all, the Truth; but he uses the crude vernacular and no elevated language in the text to be ironic. It's real, he meant every word, and it's funny, he meant every word. -
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**** tougue in cheek.
This poem says it in the most possible direct way, and you are talkinmg about "tounge in cheek"
I so wish I could tell you what its about.
But the poem saies it so much better than I ever could, and you missed it...
Warholm
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From guest Madder-Principle (contact)
I think its an interesting notion, gives new meaning to the sins of the father…but remember there is a flipside, the blessings of father & mother too. -
From guest Richard (A good bloke's Dad) (contact)
It's sad about Philip Larkin's Mum & Dad. They had nothing to give to their son - and that's what his life was filled with - nothing. It takes a long time (and almost a pension book) to realise the value of well founded and sound based parental influence. Now I'm 60, I can see all the things I couldn't a few years back! Am I biased??? -
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3 verses
Yes Billy London. That is the full poem
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What is erotic about this???
This seems to be in the wrong category...maybe this should be in 'sad' or 'society'. However, since I am here.. I found this one full of anger and disillusionment. The compostition is well done, especially the rhyme. The line,'it deepens like a coastal shelf' is a particularly good image for the sinking feeling of being lost in despair. I disagree with the authors advice, though, If you have experienced a negative, isn't that more the reason to do otherwise with your own life? Just my opinion. -
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the category was given by the volunteer who posted this here because of the language. It may seem petty but we do try
Jim
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Larkin at his best: dark , comic and profound. I thought the poem profoud when I first read it as a teenager and now as a parent, I still do. Can anyone help with the title. A man in a pub once told me that it had something to do with Robert Louis Stevenson's grave stone, but we had both had a certain amount to drink at the time.
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WOW
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