The greatest show on Earth
(non stop twenty four hours around the world)
Begins with a curtain-rise
of soft pink cloud
and a blare of golden trumpets;
The Sun's rebirth
we have seen it all before
we don't even bother to get out of bed,
or, if we're up already, we take heed
only to see will it be fine today
for our trip to the shore,
or the mountains; will it rain
for the school picnic,
will the races go on
or the test match be postponed?
And yet, one day, if the
sun should not rise,
what a loud refrain
of despair and horror
would run,
circling the whole Earth
as each place found
that today the golden trumpets
would not sound,
and the show was over!
We should think of each day
as our last for seeing the sun.
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Comments
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It must be a female thing...for I found nothing wrong with the line that Nam has taken objections with.
Also I agree with Sam...live and appreciate everyday that we have. We never know when it might be our last.
Willow -
I really do not like lines like this 'of soft pink cloud' they seem incomplete, and sometimes they go with the piece because it hints on incompleteness but so far in reading this piece it doesn't. I feel it should either be 'of soft pink clouds' or 'of a sof pink cloud' I know there are other writer's who do this, but, it just bothers me.
In this line 'of despair and horror' there is a slight spacing error between 'of' and 'despair'.
That first line still bothers me. I mean, I read the rest of the piece, and it's good, and the ending is a bit cliche, but, still that one line is bothering me - which I feel ruined the entirety of the piece for me.
It's a nice piece.
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A beautiful write. You are right, we should consider each day our last and enjoy it to the fullest. Especially the beauty that is so freely given to us.
Excellent work.
Sam
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