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Stephanie sunshine

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  • dirt at allpoetry
    i would never have known you but for an errant word - a single
  • unresolved anger in a bitter young man. at allpoetry
    his shirt falls to the floor and his guns ball up, taut-
  • a-ron in SC at allpoetry
    in the midst of morning rucks and humps and moonlit range,

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  • on The Man He Killed by Thomas Hardy, on March 31, 2004
    ooooooooh. this is wonderful. i used to be in the military and many of my acquaitances/friends... (including husband) still are. it's hard to imagine gunning down someone just because they're on opposing sides of a line. and who draws that line? i know there are a lot of conscientious objectors out there who can refuse to do those things during war. though i've never met one face to face. in theory, it's possible. anyway. i wonder how people are able to distance themselves from the reality of death brought by their own hands. i mean... thinking about all the guys that have been drafted in our nation's history. did they WANT to kill? um. almost definitely not. but did they? yes. because it was kill or be killed. but how do you recognize the humanity in your foe and still manage to do the deed?

    this was kind of whimsical. almost fumbling. like the narrator couldn't quite make sense of things but was still determined to reconcile himself to the reality of it and move on.

  • independence characterized by the definitions we create and cling to, maybe? at least, that's what i caught myself thinking during the first stanza. i'm probably stuck on something more watered down than the grand scale of nationality. here's an example...

    i'm only 24. not TOO far removed from the young generation. i became a parent at 19 and that's the role i identify with. i am a mother. to ME, as a mother, there are SO many unstated implications which i assume other people would also make. but those implications would be connotative and therefore relative to me and my perception of motherhood. right?

    so... i got in touch with an old time friend after a few years of no-contact and he was touting around this self-label:
    straight edge. i had NO idea what it was. what it meant. he had to explain it to me and also that there are different degrees and blah blah blah. and i remember thinking... okay. so... you're living pretty clean. no drugs. no alcohol. why do you need a label of distinction?

    mmmmmmm. i've rambled so much that i think i lost my original train of thought. which was just that as culture changes, so do our definitions. SOME rules of language are malleable and some are not. where do you draw the line? is ANYthing fair game?

  • on The Future Verdict by Ada Cambridge, on February 21, 2004
    this reminds me of having a strong convinction but failing completely to act on it. being a Christian, i understand the pressure to give in and live according to society's law before God's law. it's a dangerous game to play. i really enjoyed this one. i thought it expressed well part of the internal struggle associated with going "against the grain."

  • on A Coin by Carl Sandburg, on February 21, 2004
    can't help but consider this as ... having an almots sad reservation. of course, i can't REALLY get a solid sense for tone from the words alone. in any case, i was moved by the brevity. as if all the indians were deserving of was a salutory (sp?) wave while they were disposessed of their homes and their cultures.